Going And Staying Green

Green

What I do know is that depression is real. In my case, it went so deep, somedays it paralyzed me completely. Really. I am not exaggerating for dramatic effect. This dark time can now be counted in years. 

Yes, traumatic events happen. Traumatic events happen to everyone. Why it did this to me is a part of the problem. I let it. I believed it with all of my heart and soul. I believed I was overrated and deserved to be brought down. I believed I was unnecessary, replaceable. As a result, I retreated until I did not even recognize me anymore. 

I am done with it. I know what is good for me but I walked away from my responsibility to care for myself. I have to take this back into my own hands and heart. 

You see? I have a tremendous amount of talent in many areas. I do. It is true. I can sew without a pattern. I can throw ceramic pots. I can bake really good things to eat. I can decorate wedding cakes. Or any kind of cakes. I can cook a six course Indian feast in three hours. I can paint. I can make things grow. I can teach. I can be a generous friend. This is just the tip of the iceberg. 

So, I am taking on all of this awesomeness I possess and I am turning it back on myself. I am going to drink a green drink every day because I feel good when I do it. I am going to do a little yoga everyday, because I can. I am lucky to have a body that moves. I am going to use it. I am going to walk every day. Even. When. It. Rains. In Portland that is a lot, but I am not going to melt. I am going to make, make, make all of the great things I can make with my hands. 

This is my time. And I am going to share it with you.