She Is The First Thing I See When I Open My Eyes

Friday, April 22, 2011




The winter has been cold and grey and soppy. There has been snow, ice, sleet, hail, freezing temperatures and endless drops of rain. There were days when the sky seemed so heavy and dark, that I could hardly breathe. My chest felt heavy and I longed for spring deeply and with great melancholy.


She sat in the dark earth through all of this. She protected her beauty and fragile petals inside her thick brown coat. Her tenacity is admirable. It took a very long time for her to finally open to the cold, grey sky, for the ground is still very cold, despite what the calendar states. I debated about whether I should pluck her, but there are many brothers and sisters, so I brought her inside. In the pre-dawn, she appears to me as a lotus blossom. She takes me back, to the night on a train in Central India. I awoke to fussy babe, as we settled into our nursing rhythm, I glanced out at the rapidly moving night. The moon had illuminated endless watery fields of lotus blossoms, white, red and pink. As far as I could see, in the dark and lighted night, lotus blossoms bobbed on the horizon.

This tulip, this sweet, tenacious tulip worked all winter, guarding her gifts, tending her soft core, to bring this beautiful, haunting memory back to me. Thank you, sweet girl.

2 comments:

Run Lori Run said...

Is that the catcher in the rye I see?

I know! The weather has been AWFUL here! But I hear the sun will be here SUNDAY!

Puanani said...

It IS Cathcher in The Rye. I just reread it after many years...