Waiting To Rise

Monday, January 18, 2010


Life seems to be getting the best of me. It is a weary time. There is rain, but that is not the reason. I love the rain. I flung the windows open, lifted the linen drapes and welcomed in the fat and furious rain drops. Only when the pillows began to become damp, did I feel the need to shut the window, a little bit...


No, I am in a winter weary. Loving the rain, but overwhelmed by the trials of daily life. My eldest had gone off to school but struggles with the day to day activities of life on one's own. It is difficult not to let her know at every turn how fortunate she is, because the fact remains...she will only know when she knows.

So, we drove her six hours north. We tidied her kitchen. We spent an extraordinary amount of money at Trader Joe's, stocking her larder with all things moderately healthy, but quick and easy. This was all in hopes that if food is covered, then studying should be easy to slip in to the schedule.

As we drove south toward the highway, the phone rang, "Do you want me to come back?" I asked.

"Yes, please."

So she is here. I did what I would want my mother to do. Give me time. We have time. School starts on Monday. Another drive through the fertile California valley, to the sea. I have time.

Today, I wait. I wait to rise to the occasion.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

You are an amazing mom, Puanani! You are an inspiration to me.

Mary

Mel said...

This post gives me a smile and a tear...!

I remember once, my Mother coming back for me. When I was waiting for the bus to take me to boarding school my freshman highschool year. But it was too late. The bus had already come.

She wrote me about it... a loving note. It has shaped me. Brings me comfort now. Even though we didn't connect. Even and especially as she isn't with me any longer. Precious memory, heart treasured jewel.

You are bejeweled, the two of you. It's apparent!

Love and hugs and joy to you...

ps How funny, my fellow leonine friend-- I baked a round artisinal loaf which looked very similar to your dough the same day as your post..! xo